Our last section ended with Bella being nostalgic about how it had been one year since she moved to Forks. That doesn't seem right to me because it's January now (an important point as we will discover later) and I had some inclination that she moved to Forks in the Fall, at least that is how the descriptions of it went. The kids were still going outside and such, visiting the beach, in winter? Maybe, but with the temperature averages as a high in the mid 40s and lows in the mid 30s, it seems unlikely that despite what we are being told, this story is taking place in January right now. Especially with the building of the motorcycles. The weather in Forks is apparently a slave to the plot's needs: which is bad bad writing. You can't appeal against nature.
Our chapter begins with Bella driving to the Cullen's old house, which they've apparently not sold but rather abandoned. Yep, nothing says inconspicuous like just leaving a house that you will still have to pay taxes on. It's odd that this one detail is missed, because it could have been quite important. Bella could see a "For Sale/Sold" sign on the front of the driveway or have seen people moving in. Anything but the abandoned house would make more sense than this. Shouldn't someone be trying to sell this immaculate house that was described to us in the last book, even if Carlisle sold it at below value?
"Now that I was really awake, the nothingness of the dream gnawed on my nerves, a dog worrying a bone."
There's a lot wrong with that sentence. Bella is giving us her thoughts as she drives up toward the Cullen house. First off, what is this dream she is describing? The only one we have been given is her lost in the woods with the sense that someone was searching for her and then she can't get out. So where is the nothingness? This is a flat out pandering attempt to be deep. The nothingness isn't there, it's a sense of being lost, and it's a wonder that I can describe the dream's metaphor better than the person who made it up. Secondly "nothingness" can't gnaw, because it's nothing. Nothing can't do anything because it is, by definition, no thing. Thirdly, I get what the metaphor at the end of that sentence is supposed to do but it's obviously shoe-horned in. You can almost see the "like" that is missing between "nerves," and "a" that was simply deleted. I think Meyer was getting sick of using similes. The whole sentence is just clunky, unless of course she's actually seeing a dog worrying* a bone.
Why is she here? Because she wants to jog her brain into producing the memory of Edward's voice. Meh, I'll buy that, we've all done something really stupid and inane when we were just dumped, but then I remember that her being dumped was four/five months ago. We're being hit with a hammer here, and not in a good way. See, Bella is truly and irrevocably in love with Edward, at least that's what we are told and we are being told that this is still the case. Told, but never shown. You expect that at novel two the writing would get better. Why is she chasing a memory of a voice when this is how she describes the owner of that voice, "unattainable and impossible, uncaring and distracted..."
The first adjective makes sense, but that's it. "Impossible?" What's impossible? She already had him. "Uncaring and distracted" those two show me who she's talking about but not why she's chasing him. It's like she's telling us that she wants someone who doesn't show any concern for her and won't pay attention to her either. He's a winner, but we never really know why.
"The tall ferns had infiltrated the meadow around the house..." This is a good example of why we, as in everyone aspiring to be a writer in the current age, have a distinct advantage over every generation of writer previous: we have the internet. I get the fact that Meyer wants to show the passage of time by having the plants grow in the yard...er meadow. But ferns have a life cycle and a quick trip to wikipedia can show us that the ferns wouldn't have grown that fast, in the damn winter. This isn't Pripyat Russia where thirty to forty years have passed since anyone has lived there. It's been five months, but it's also been winter months and shit doesn't grow in the winter. That's why it's winter and not Spring. That's why Peresephone spends this time with Hades and the rest of the time outside of the realm of the dead. Simple research, or just plain observation. We could have had longer grass, or better yet mud soaked driveways given the rain, instead we've got some sort of super spreading vegetation, must be all of the sparkles.
Sigh.
"Nothingness of Nightmares..." despite the fact that we've already discussed that her nightmares aren't about nothingness this sounds like the title track to my failed heavy metal band "Kefka's Abadon." It's one of those phrases that sounds really cool but makes no sense if you stop to think about it objectively. It's like our author read one line of Nietzsche "if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes into you" and decided to run with it in order to make Bella's whining over her six month relationship with Eddie that much more plausible.
As we are abruptly led to the Cullen's house we are led out of it. Seriously, Bella decides that she is leaving and it's off to Jacob's place for some more bike work. This is where it gets interesting. We know that Jacob has a crush on Bella (for some reason) from last book. He's a bit younger but they've been playing a rather cute game where they keep adding years to their age for skills and acheivements. I wonder how many Bella lost for her clumsiness?** Jake shows some foresight here with the game because it lessens the reality of the chronological difference between them. Then he places a thinly veiled confession of his attraction and affection toward Bella. It's a bold move by the 16 year old, but it's out there. What happens? Nothing. It's a huge moment in their friendship, one that could very well break it in any realistic setting and it's like it never happens.
Back at school, with no transition or anything, Bella remarks about how her friends have "kindly overlooked my few months of aberrant behavior." First off, let's take a quick visit to the dictionary to define "aberrant" which is a deviation from the normal. This is the wrong word. Bella has been just the same as she was before. Those last few months where she was just sitting and not talking to everyone was exactly the same as when Eddie and Alice where in town. They all sat at the same table, but Bella just ignored them. So how exactly has her ignoring of her friends the last few months been any different than it has the last year? The only actual difference is that in the last few months she hasn't been ignoring them in favor of someone else but they were still getting shunned.
Not everyone is happy about her "return" (because she hasn't gone anywhere), "...Jess was more resistant. I wondered if she needed a formal written apology for the Port Angeles incident." Again with the "Jessica is a bitch because I say she's a bitch." Maybe Bella should try an oral apology, or any kind of apology before making this claim. None of it makes sense, Jessica has a legitimate complaint here and doubly so since Bella hasn't shown any kind of remorse for scaring the crap out of her.
"I needed something to distract me from nightmare and nothingness." I went to a Catholic highschool, and one friday every month they made us go to church. Eventually I realized that while they could make me go, make me kneel, and make me sing/chant/recite they couldn't make me pray. Same thing here Meyer, you can keep making me read words like "nothingness" or "abyss" or "numbness" but I'm not going to believe it. Bella is not deep, she doesn't have dreams about abadon or oblivion. She's a superficial bitch who lost her good looking rich boyfriend, and now has to cope with the reality that she may not be at the top of the ladder anymore. I suppose that might be worse than nothing for her though.
_____________________
*"Worrying" here is actually correct, it's antiquated, but correct.
**Wait a second, did that aspect of her personality just go away because it's no longer convenient for the plot? Strange.
Our chapter begins with Bella driving to the Cullen's old house, which they've apparently not sold but rather abandoned. Yep, nothing says inconspicuous like just leaving a house that you will still have to pay taxes on. It's odd that this one detail is missed, because it could have been quite important. Bella could see a "For Sale/Sold" sign on the front of the driveway or have seen people moving in. Anything but the abandoned house would make more sense than this. Shouldn't someone be trying to sell this immaculate house that was described to us in the last book, even if Carlisle sold it at below value?
"Now that I was really awake, the nothingness of the dream gnawed on my nerves, a dog worrying a bone."
There's a lot wrong with that sentence. Bella is giving us her thoughts as she drives up toward the Cullen house. First off, what is this dream she is describing? The only one we have been given is her lost in the woods with the sense that someone was searching for her and then she can't get out. So where is the nothingness? This is a flat out pandering attempt to be deep. The nothingness isn't there, it's a sense of being lost, and it's a wonder that I can describe the dream's metaphor better than the person who made it up. Secondly "nothingness" can't gnaw, because it's nothing. Nothing can't do anything because it is, by definition, no thing. Thirdly, I get what the metaphor at the end of that sentence is supposed to do but it's obviously shoe-horned in. You can almost see the "like" that is missing between "nerves," and "a" that was simply deleted. I think Meyer was getting sick of using similes. The whole sentence is just clunky, unless of course she's actually seeing a dog worrying* a bone.
Why is she here? Because she wants to jog her brain into producing the memory of Edward's voice. Meh, I'll buy that, we've all done something really stupid and inane when we were just dumped, but then I remember that her being dumped was four/five months ago. We're being hit with a hammer here, and not in a good way. See, Bella is truly and irrevocably in love with Edward, at least that's what we are told and we are being told that this is still the case. Told, but never shown. You expect that at novel two the writing would get better. Why is she chasing a memory of a voice when this is how she describes the owner of that voice, "unattainable and impossible, uncaring and distracted..."
The first adjective makes sense, but that's it. "Impossible?" What's impossible? She already had him. "Uncaring and distracted" those two show me who she's talking about but not why she's chasing him. It's like she's telling us that she wants someone who doesn't show any concern for her and won't pay attention to her either. He's a winner, but we never really know why.
"The tall ferns had infiltrated the meadow around the house..." This is a good example of why we, as in everyone aspiring to be a writer in the current age, have a distinct advantage over every generation of writer previous: we have the internet. I get the fact that Meyer wants to show the passage of time by having the plants grow in the yard...er meadow. But ferns have a life cycle and a quick trip to wikipedia can show us that the ferns wouldn't have grown that fast, in the damn winter. This isn't Pripyat Russia where thirty to forty years have passed since anyone has lived there. It's been five months, but it's also been winter months and shit doesn't grow in the winter. That's why it's winter and not Spring. That's why Peresephone spends this time with Hades and the rest of the time outside of the realm of the dead. Simple research, or just plain observation. We could have had longer grass, or better yet mud soaked driveways given the rain, instead we've got some sort of super spreading vegetation, must be all of the sparkles.
Sigh.
"Nothingness of Nightmares..." despite the fact that we've already discussed that her nightmares aren't about nothingness this sounds like the title track to my failed heavy metal band "Kefka's Abadon." It's one of those phrases that sounds really cool but makes no sense if you stop to think about it objectively. It's like our author read one line of Nietzsche "if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes into you" and decided to run with it in order to make Bella's whining over her six month relationship with Eddie that much more plausible.
As we are abruptly led to the Cullen's house we are led out of it. Seriously, Bella decides that she is leaving and it's off to Jacob's place for some more bike work. This is where it gets interesting. We know that Jacob has a crush on Bella (for some reason) from last book. He's a bit younger but they've been playing a rather cute game where they keep adding years to their age for skills and acheivements. I wonder how many Bella lost for her clumsiness?** Jake shows some foresight here with the game because it lessens the reality of the chronological difference between them. Then he places a thinly veiled confession of his attraction and affection toward Bella. It's a bold move by the 16 year old, but it's out there. What happens? Nothing. It's a huge moment in their friendship, one that could very well break it in any realistic setting and it's like it never happens.
Back at school, with no transition or anything, Bella remarks about how her friends have "kindly overlooked my few months of aberrant behavior." First off, let's take a quick visit to the dictionary to define "aberrant" which is a deviation from the normal. This is the wrong word. Bella has been just the same as she was before. Those last few months where she was just sitting and not talking to everyone was exactly the same as when Eddie and Alice where in town. They all sat at the same table, but Bella just ignored them. So how exactly has her ignoring of her friends the last few months been any different than it has the last year? The only actual difference is that in the last few months she hasn't been ignoring them in favor of someone else but they were still getting shunned.
Not everyone is happy about her "return" (because she hasn't gone anywhere), "...Jess was more resistant. I wondered if she needed a formal written apology for the Port Angeles incident." Again with the "Jessica is a bitch because I say she's a bitch." Maybe Bella should try an oral apology, or any kind of apology before making this claim. None of it makes sense, Jessica has a legitimate complaint here and doubly so since Bella hasn't shown any kind of remorse for scaring the crap out of her.
"I needed something to distract me from nightmare and nothingness." I went to a Catholic highschool, and one friday every month they made us go to church. Eventually I realized that while they could make me go, make me kneel, and make me sing/chant/recite they couldn't make me pray. Same thing here Meyer, you can keep making me read words like "nothingness" or "abyss" or "numbness" but I'm not going to believe it. Bella is not deep, she doesn't have dreams about abadon or oblivion. She's a superficial bitch who lost her good looking rich boyfriend, and now has to cope with the reality that she may not be at the top of the ladder anymore. I suppose that might be worse than nothing for her though.
_____________________
*"Worrying" here is actually correct, it's antiquated, but correct.
**Wait a second, did that aspect of her personality just go away because it's no longer convenient for the plot? Strange.
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